Diana Villas Boas Stripping by the Bed

 For all these years I thought my time was wasted in those elementary school music classes, but finally there is an opportunity for me to showcase my xylophone skills on the abs of Diana Villas Boas. I can play a mean version of Hot Crossed Buns. My abilities as a xylophonist are eclipsed only by my talent with a recorder, but I do not see how I can work that into this scenario. If the whole modeling thing does not take off for Diana, as infinitesimally as that may be, she should feel secure in knowing she could make a killing as a street performer. People would line up down the street to get a gander at her playing her abs with a couple mallets. She would easily make fifty to sixty dollars a day, minimum. That could pay for a lot of toaster waffles, I am just saying. Considering how impressed people are by seeing guys drum on those plastic buckets I would say she is worth at least a silver dollar, and that is a compliment I do not hand out everyday. 

_{Photo Credit: Felipe Gonçalves}