Tawny Swain Is My New Favorite Redhead

 This is one instance where I pray for there to be false advertising because depending on how literal that shirt is, I might break down into tears if it is not. If those booty shorts get pulled down and I find myself in a Crying Game situation it will be too much for my poor little heart to handle. If I survive, I will shun society and live out the rest of my days, however many or few that may be, as a hermit in the mountains of Montana.

Any woman who has the gumption to allow a picture to be taken of her while she is on the porcelain throne and wearing a Darth Vader mask is one deserving of a ring. And I am not talking about one of those faux diamond moissanite rings; I am talking about a big ol' blood diamond that was smuggled out of Africa in a Dutchman's bum...because she's worth it. 

I am cheaper than a senior citizen at an all you can eat buffet, but even I would be willing to shell out the money for her. A tattooed ginger with a sense of humor comes around once in a blue moon. 

Photo Credit: Photographer Ryan Meyers for B-Authentique