VIEWER WARNING: Selena Gomez and Justin Bieber Doing Worse Than Nasty

For the love of all that is holy... NO!!!!

I wish I could unsee these photos. That there were some Eternal Sunshine or Total Recall machine I could plant my melon in, crank that mother up well past the red level dangerous threshold mark, and ease my hippocampus back into blissful ignorance. If only it were so. If only my retinal cones had not observed the sight of 110-pounds of teenaged midget ghostliness pawing, mauling, handling, kissing, and dry-humping my beloved Selena Gomez.

No!!!!!!!!!

I can survive Radical Islamic Fundamentalism. I can endure Global Warming and the melting of the polar ice caps. I shall even abide the obvious lunacy of Lady Gaga making FHM's 100 Sexiest Women list, but Justin Bieber simply must be stopped. Get your hands off my lady's asstastic!

If you be brave, and not the queasy sort, there are a good number of plain old sexy Selena Gomez bikini pictures in this gallery.

(Also, be sure to join us on the Egotastic! Facebook page for a discussion of this collective social tragedy.)